First Attempt

I was 11 or 12, it was the first year anyway.
It had been a hard day. To be honest,  every day was hard. But that day had drained me. I was in bed,  keeping quiet, waiting for lights out and sleep.
Maybe tomorrow the nightmare woukd be over. Maybe tomorrow people would be nice to me. Maybe.
He came running in from Blue Dorm. JD, a year older than me. He was laughing hysterically and carrying something. He threw it, it landed square in my face. A bag full of water.
I was soaked, my bed was soaked, our dorm was full of people laughing and pointing. And then the chant started. I fucking hated the chant.
"Hugh, Pugh, Barney Magrew. Cuthbert, Dibble and CHUBBY MAGRUBBY!"
Seems like nothing now but it was constant. All the time. They never fucking let up.
Our dorm was only on the first floor but it was a long way down to the ground. The window was open and I was sick of life. The bullying I thought would stop after primary school had just carried on and now I couldn't even go home to escape it. I wanted it to be over and over for good.
Suddenly I was out of bed and running to the window. I was half out, I could see my escape from the taunting. But they had hold of me. They wouldn't let go. Then the prefect came and hauled me back. I fought as hard as I could. I bit and kicked. I couldn't understand why they wouldn't let me go. They all seemed to hate me so much.
Eventually they had me inside and were holding me down on the floor. Shouting at me to calm down.
Matron A. Came in and took me to dispensary. Gave me a sleeping pill and a lecture on what an awful person I must be to consider suicide.
They left me alone for about a week.